Stepping Stones

by Carol Hansen

"Loving Communications"

©1994

I am always looking for easy tools that can help me through life's major and not so major transitions. When I find one that really works, it is my joy to share it with everyone. I'm going to share this tool with you by way of a story.

There was a young woman named Andrea who appeared to be happy and joyful. Whenever anyone would ask her how she was doing she would smile and say "just wonderful". Her friends became concerned when they began to notice that she was looking tired and her color was becoming pale. But when they would inquire about her health she would just smile and say, "I've never felt better."

This woman's relationships began to change with some of those who were close to her. Some of her friends began to feel angry when in her presence and they could not figure out why. They found themselves yelling at her for no apparent reason. Some friendships began to deteriorate without any apparent cause.

Then one day Andrea announced that she had been diagnosed with a debilitating illness. She admitted that she had known about this illness for months but had kept it to herself. She was only telling a few of her close friends about it because she didn't want the world to know that she wasn't the happy, joyful person she envisioned herself to be.

One of her friends became quite ill within a few days of hearing about Andrea's illness. The friend's illness became acute. The friend sought all types of healing and nothing seemed to help. Then one day someone suggested to the friend that perhaps the illness that she was manifesting in her body was not her own. That perhaps she was "running someone else's program." She was guided to get in touch with when the illness began and to try to identify any event that may have occurred just prior to the onset of the illness. She remembered that her illness began shortly after Andrea had confided to her. She was then guided to get in touch with any emotions she had been experiencing since her illness. She realized that she had been feeling extreme anger (particularly toward Andrea) as well as despair, helplessness, confusion and grief. She was then guided to say the following:

"Andrea, I got your experience. I got your anger, your despair, your helplessness, your confusion and your grief. I even got the physical manifestation of all these emotions. I now release myself from these emotions and I release you to your Divine Path."

Literally, within minutes the friend's symptoms disappeared and she again felt like herself. She had deprogrammed her system from Andrea's program (unexpressed emotions) and had reinstalled her own operating system. Now when she is with Andrea she can be compassionate and friendly. The anger she had been feeling in their relationship (which was really Andrea's suppressed anger expressing through the friend) is no longer running her.

The above tool came to me by way of a transformative weekend workshop called Loving Communications. The workshop overflowed with tools of many kinds to help us navigate through relationships and get in touch with emotions that are perhaps running our lives.

I was the friend in that story. For the past two months I have been quite ill, so ill that I felt that perhaps my transition time was near at hand. In Loving Communications we were taught that when someone is in denial about their emotions--decides to be "stoic" and put on a smile when inside they are raging --those emotions will be spewed out on the energetic level. And when someone is so much into denial about their emotions, physical ailments are bound to manifest. Those who are in relationship with someone like that can pick up on those emotions and run them in their own body without even realizing it. The emotions will feel as if they are your own. And the physical manifestation of those emotions can also be passed on!

As soon as I got in touch with that concept and did the process described in the story, my illness vanished. Almost immediately the universe provided validation that this was not just an isolated incident that had only happened to me. A few days after my "miraculous' recovery another healer from another center confided that she had experienced almost the exact phenomenon during almost the exact time frame. She too got in touch with the fact that her illness was not her own and that she was running her husband's and son's unexpressed emotions. She did a clearing and her symptoms disappeared.

If you feel that you are manifesting a physical condition that may not be your own, try this process. It may be just the tool you need to free yourself to be yourself again.